“Write hard and clear about what hurts”- Ernest Hemmingway
Being authentic can be freeing physically, emotionally and spiritually.
How often in life, growing up or even right at this moment, have you felt unable or powerless to be the real you. Afraid of not fitting in or being the odd one out.
From an early age we start wearing the cloak of what we think we ‘should’ be or what is perceived by our peer group to be ‘normal’ and acceptable and in doing so we lose ourselves. Our true self.
Authenticity is such a wonderful word and when you meet someone authentic it is something to behold.
With authenticity comes freedom, inner peace, joy and release.
You get to know your real self.
Vulnerability goes hand-in-hand with authenticity and this is where we get scared.
“If I am vulnerable I’m weak”.
It is not the case.
You will know when it is okay to share and when not to as you become more aware of your true being. It is much better to say “I have been better”, than to say “I am fine” if you really aren’t fine!
Stop People Pleasing
Letting others have their way when you really want to tell the truth doesn’t make you a kind person it makes you a resentful one.
You have to get comfortable about feeling uncomfortable!
For so long you may have felt bad about saying no and agreed to so many things that you know just weren’t right for you.
You can stop now with the conviction that it is okay to say no, yes, maybe and not have to explain any of them.
Write it down
Begin by putting pen to paper and writing it down.
Anything in your life that you have kept down, suppressed, locked away and hidden because its just too frightening to let it out.
Be clear and true.
As Earnest Hemmingway said, “write hard and clear about what hurts”.
Throughout life stuff happens
It may be the smallest memory; as a child your sibling got something and you didn’t or a comment a friend made or something you did that you can’t quite forgive yourself for.
You may tell yourself that the hurt was small and insignificant, but it wasn’t because you still feel it.
Write it down.
Be honest, raw, vulnerable and scribble until you have got it all off your chest.
However small it seems or how long ago it was.
It’s not insignificant.
The art of journaling is a healthy and healing practice.
In fact every night before you go to sleep it is helpful to put pen to paper any worries, fears or troubles you have felt during the day.
Show yourself some compassion
If we aren’t real with people then how can we truly connect?
With authenticity comes compassion to yourself and to others.
Perversely the world of social media and television tries to show us the real deal through posts, pictures and reality TV but really it couldn’t be less authentic if it tried.
Lets get back to the truth and unburden the world.
Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: ‘What! You Too? I thought I was the only one.’ C.S. Lewis